Negotiating Challenging Moments

Why It’s Important to be Aware of Your Feelings

When there is a rough moment between you and someone else, you may find yourself to be automatically upset. Someone says something you don’t care for, and you’re upset. It’s quite immediate.

If you can identify to yourself how you feel in that moment, then there’s a buffer between how you feel and your expression of that feeling. You’re then able to talk about your difficult feeling. You’re no longer speaking automatically and without regard for the impact that your words have on somebody else.

You may have felt hurt by another – sad, frustrated, angry, or maybe even have felt hopeless in a particular situation. By naming your feeling, you get to choose the best and wisest way to speak to someone about it. No matter how the other person may respond to your own feeling that you’ve just expressed, just continue to be both respectful and authentic to the other person, yourself, and of course, to the relationship. Your practice of continuing to be both respectful and authentic, no matter what is said to you, will help you negotiate whatever difficulties that may or may not continue to arise, and will then lead you toward a sense of internal freedom and compassion. At that point, you will be in accord with the deepest values of your being. By being aware of your feelings, you are able to convey them in a way that supports your relationships and enhances your access to awareness itself.